For the first time in a very long time, I finally made it to the Pasar Malam (Night Market).. 2 feelings presented themselves to me.. why I liked going to the Pasar Malams, and why I didn't like Pasar Malams.. love the variety of things they have there.. food, fruit, stuff, accesorries, clothes, drinks, pirated kids education materials (lol!!), etc.. hate the heat, the smelliness, and the puddles on the ground >.<

I would've much rather preferred to have gone home and slept after dinner, but, something caught my attention, and i really wanted to go get some.. lol!! yes, impulsive i am.. some dude was going round the tables at dinner and selling lychees.. i was like, oooh! I want some.. they were big and red.. they looked good *grins* and well, my dad said we'll hit the night market after dinner and look for some.. I think i have the world's best dad ;) well, most of the time.. haha..

We did get lychees.. and yes they are sweet :) I couldn't eat more than 5 though.. saving them for tomorrow maybe..

But that isn't why I decided to blog instead of hitting the sack.. sighh..

I saw a lady begging by the side of a stall.. and I guess that's a usual sight.. maybe it's because I haven't been out there for awhile.. maybe my heart's less indifferent.. i don't really know.. but when i saw her, it stopped me in my tracks.. she had little legs.. probably even smaller than her arms.. and i didn't have money.. she was moving away on her arms.. i wanted to go to my dad to get some money, or maybe some food for her.. i didn't know.. i didn't know what to do.. knowing that if i gave her cash, it'd go to someone else, and i didn't know what i should do.. walking off with that question in my head.. saw another dude on the floor as well.. wanted to go back to look for the other lady.. but we'd to go.. and all the way back in the car, i kept wondering what i could've done.. and as i reached home.. i thought about Peter and John and what they did for the lame man.. I could've, i should've.. it didn't cross my mind to.. it was not my 1st response.. my 1st was philantrophy.. and i don't know at this point of time.. i've gotta think..

So much more out there.. how do I be Jesus to them.. so much to do.. and all I do is sit here, watching movies on my laptop, planning stuff, tiring myself out, looking for food.. gah.. it bothers me.. i can't.. my heart doesn't allow me to anymore.. i need help.. i need to think.. i need to pray..